The End of the World is in Your Living Room
I sometimes wonder what will go through the minds of the species that takes over the Earth after we humans global warm ourselves into extinction.
All judgments aside, I mean. I imagine what will be left behind, and the precision with which the relics and memories of our time will be preserved, thanks to the digital revolution.
If it has a curiosity similar to our own, the species that survives – before it, too, dies out – will surely investigate us and our downfall, both anthropologically and meteorologically.
I wouldn’t be at all surprised if the downfall of our species is connected to…
…the recliner.
It’s been encouraging passivity in the American public since 1928.
Combine that near-horizontal position with the hypnosis of television and you’ve got a human being that’s sleeping awake.
Of course, recliners are comfortable. Lying down is relaxing, because all muscles have a chance to take a break. It’s why most people sleep lying down.
But comfortable is not always good for you. Fast food is comfort food, but it’ll kill you. Why is it so good then? It’s hard-wired into us, instinctively, to store on ourselves the fat that can carry us through a slow hunting season. It’s the same way with lying down. The body needs rest; that’s when it repairs itself, and when you dream. And it feels so good to recline not only because the body exerts no effort but because the mind is fully conscious of it.
If you were a farmer and worked hard all day, then hit the sack, you’d probably fall asleep very quickly. There’s little time to acknowledge that it feels good to rest, but in those moments, the feeling is one of peace.
Same deal with the recliner.
The mind continues to realize how good it feels to lie around. Ah, but after a while, the mind is restless and thinks it must do more with a day…
Television! Don’t sleep at night, stay up and watch t.v.! Get more tired! Drink more coffee! Expensive coffee! There’s a shop on every corner! Be a good American, kill two birds with one stone and destroy yourself and make us rich by consuming what we’re selling!
Leave the producing to us…
…and go to sleep. Stop moving and stop thinking and don’t put up a fight when we steal all your money and your life…
In other news, many networks open their television seasons tonight.
The cosmic ballet… goes on.
